Who Should Star in Space Jam 2? The Best Candidates
Speculation about the next Space Jam has been around since the original ejected out of your VHS player. The movie was a monumental success, solidifying Michael Jordan’s status as an immortal icon, a figure who exists outside of space and time, relaxing in the stratosphere of greatest athletes ever.
It is this success, despite mixed critical review, that has fueled the speculative fires of a sequel for so long. Read this from Wikipedia:
“In February 2014, Warner Bros. announced a potential sequel set to star LeBron James. Charlie Ebersol was set to produce, with a script by his brother, Willie. Representatives of James denied the claim that he would be involved. In May 2014, James was quoted as saying, "I've always loved Space Jam. It was one of my favorite movies growing up. If I have the opportunity, it will be great.” In July 2015, James and his production company, SpringHill Entertainment, signed a deal with Warner Bros. for television, movies and digital content after receiving positive reviews for his acting role in Trainwreck. On May 2, 2016, Justin Lin was said to be in talks to direct the sequel; co-writing the screenplay with Andrew Dodge and Alfredo Botello. In August 2016, the Sneaker Bar Detroit company said that the movie is still in the works. On November 15, 2016, the film's anniversary, a teaser trailer, in the form of a Nike advertisement, was released on Twitter under #MonstarsBack. On December 1, 2016, Bugs Bunny and the Monstars returned in a Foot Locker commercial starring Blake Griffin and Jimmy Butler.
In a November 2016 interview with Mr. Wavvy, Space Jam director Joe Pytka revealed that following the first film's success, he had been pitched a "really weird" idea for a sequel that would have starred pro golfer Tiger Woods, with Jordan in a smaller role. Pytka explained how the idea came from an out of studio script conference, with people who worked on the original film allegedly involved. Ultimately, nothing materialized from the idea. Producer Ivan Reitman participated in similar interview with Mr. Wavvy, also in November 2016, in which he also revealed an idea he had for a sequel, though his sequel would have starred Jordan.”
First thing, I don’t know Joe Pytka, and I don’t know why he’s talking to Mr. Waavy, but Joe needs to throw the Tiger Woods plan in the trash. What a horrible idea, Joe. That’s like making the sequel to “White Fang” about this history of “Thomas the Tank Engine.” What a senseless pitch, Joe.
Second thing, I love that Warner Brother’s (an actual, professional company) said that there was a sequel in the works with LeBron, and LeBron said “What?”
This is nothing but a huge rumor mill, and I’m fed up with it. I am so exhausted. I’ve decided to step in and make things easy for everyone involved. Below, I’ve listed the best candidates to lead the next generation of hardwood houdinis into tomorrow. In no order:
This is the obvious choice. So obvious, in fact, that Warner Brothers announced this before it even existed. It makes so much sense that it hurts. LeBron is the greatest basketball player of all time, and though he may not quite have the icon status of Michael Jordan, a successful Space Jam sequel could force him into the immortality status of Jordan.
So here, I’m thinking the Space Jam could turn towards more of a musical approach. Rubio has that wonderful, appealing, Spanish vibe that would be adorable when paired with memorable show tunes and non-optional singalong subtitles. I would love to see Ricky Rubio and a band of merry cartoon pals (specifically Johnathan Bravo) dancing on the hardwood and steering Space Jam towards a more teenage female inclusive brand.
If we want our children to grow up and learn the anti-values of betraying their best friends and always giving in to their enemies, I think Kevin Durant would be a great choice. Maybe your kid doesn’t have an evil side or a single bone in his body that would indicate he or she is capable of throwing friendships into the trash. If you’d like to make sure your kid has a little darkness inside of them, this iteration of the film would do that.
“Elevator” Ernie Johnson would espouse the values of correct living onto our children, and I’m convinced of that. Ernie is a morally snow white human, and I would love nothing more than my children to harvest his wisdom, kindness, and sense of priorities.
This, to me, is the most compelling storyline. This riveting sequel would follow the newest iteration of Monstar technology, not in which they remain enhanced cartoon characters with stolen talent, but where they are actual humans. Birdman is the obvious candidate, and I think it’s hard to prove they haven’t already done this. The Monstars, of course, would create 5 Birdmen and make a team. Birdman/Birdmen are not really the hero/heroes of this story, he/they is/are more of the supreme victim/victims or villain/villains. The highest art summoned from this storyline is a team of that jerk Steve Blake, Miles Plumlee, Myers Leonard, Aron Baynes, and Alex Len banding together to stop the possessed Birdmen. The odds are nearly insurmountable. Our children would learn the powers of team work to overcome the greatest evils of life.
When studying marketing, you learn quickly that people like authenticity. They like to see themselves in the product. Spencer Hawes is an everyday human. You’ve probably seen him in the super market or buying clove cigarettes from the corner Texaco. I would love to see the next generation empowered in truth, knowing that even they, a normal, plain person, could one day be in the NBA.
If we’re talking about art appreciation or film history, I believe that silent films are a truly underestimated and understated medium. I wish that in my liberal arts education, I was exposed to the art form more, and I want to change that for the incoming generation. Making a silent film with Kahwi Leonard would be easy. He also might just not show up to the set.